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Want to prevent conflict? Focus on appreciation!

Conflict often produces fight-flight-freeze responses in our body, which increases our tendency to look for more conflict or threats in our environment. One way we can reduce or prevent this response is by focusing on appreciation and gratitude, both with ourselves and with our university colleagues, direct reports or supervisors.

You may be thinking you are too busy to offer an appreciation to a colleague. However, consider how much time you spend addressing conflict. By comparison, spending 1-2 minutes to offer an appreciation can not only save you hours of dealing with conflict later, but also lead to happier and healthier individuals and teams. Try giving one of these quick appreciations with someone you work with this week:

See and express in the moment: When you see something, express your appreciation now. Why wait? It just takes a moment for you and will mean the world to your colleague. Focus on the impact they have on you or others – “Thank you for taking care of ___, this will make it easier for me to ____.”

Share observations: You don’t need to say “I appreciate you” to show appreciation. A quick acknowledgment can communicate that you care enough to notice and check in. Example: “Hey, I noticed you seemed to have a busy week this week. Do you need any support?”

What do you have to lose? Give a colleague or two an appreciation this week!